Druthers

I never liked the word druthers.
The meaning is simply preference.
It sounds like what birds leave behind after they molt their feathers.

Nevertheless, had I my druthers, I would be a writer.
Argue my merit as you read my blog. That's fine.
I think that's the point.

I want to be like David Sedaris. Writing essays and making people pee themselves on public transportation between my trips to France and Italy.

I want to verbosely detail my visits to the worlds eating hotspots and obfuscate my opinions by both lavishing the food with compliments and particulating the country's horrifying political unrest. Anthony Bourdain, eat your heart out.

Basically I want to be on permanent vacation while fulfilling the part of me that yearns for artistic expression.
Apparently I want to be a white male too.
Possibly gay and thorny.

Oddly enough, this all makes me perfect for sales.
Not the sexual or racial confusion part.

I make people laugh.
I'm curious and resourceful.
I'm extremely personable.

If I can get behind your product, if I'm passionate about it, I'll sell the shit out of it through fits of laughter and curious personability.

The End.